Whatever At Best

I spent Thursday at my Dad’s house for Thanksgiving. My uncle Glenn and his family where there, having a good time, arguing with each other and so on. Glenn is a tall guy, the tallest in the family, and he’s got a great sense of humor. He’s the third youngest of six although he looks older because he used to smoke quite a bit. I just found out that he had a heart attack on Saturday, just a couple days after I saw him, he’s fine now, but I still feel a little shaken up about the news. Normally when I receive news like this I take it in stride. I never get upset, or worried, or depressed. When I was held up, I didn’t think about anything, my mind was completely blank, no anger, no panic, nothing. When my grandfather died I didn’t shed a tear, I was sad though, I loved him. This news though came as quite a shock to me and I feel a little weird about it. Maybe I felt a little more connected to him than my grandfather? I never did connect to my grandfather, he’s old, as grandfathers usually are, also he became more and more deaf as his years passed by, and he was getting sicker as well so maybe since it wasn’t a surprise it didn’t hit me as hard. If that’s right then I’m probably going to have a really hard time when my father dies, when I get married and my wife dies, or my kids. I suppose that’s the way of things. Scary to consider.